Monday, July 21, 2008


You know, I wonder sometimes how I can possibly keep my kids safe until they grow up, and how if I manage to do that I will be able to relinquish control of their safety to trust them to take care of themselves when they do.

Today they can reach something they couldn't reach yesterday. Know how I know that? Svea reached wayyyy up high and grabbed a brand new fillet knife off my counter the other day and I didn't know she had it until I heard her banging something around on things and became alarmed at the curious clang she was making. My heart fell into my arse as I frantically flew across the room at her so I could grab the sword she was wielding before the unthinkable happened. Imagine all the things that could have happened? What if she had fell, or poked one of her siblings with it, or what if what if what if?

I am a pretty paranoid mom, after all. I religiously keep my bathroom door closed, day and night. No face cloth in the tub. Door handle cover on the knob. I am scared-to-death of my kids getting in that tub and drowning before I know they are even in there. I consider myself a careful mother....but I am constantly reminded of how out of control some things really can be.

We have these log railings that are a bit too high from the actual stairs and the girls have figured out not only how to crawl under the railing, but also to move the chair I put in front to prevent them from doing it so they can do it anyways and get upstairs. So I generally close all the gates behind me. But this morning my kids disappeared while I was feeding the baby and I could suddenly hear a suspicious giggling closet door slamming partyfest in my bedroom. How odd. The gate was closed, after all.

I guess I am just saying that you can be the worlds most careful parent, and bad things can happen anyway. I am so scared of that. No one told me when I became a mother that I would spend half my time feeling guilty and the other half worrying myself wrinkly. And you know what? I wouldn't have believed them anyways.

Life is so complicated sometimes. Ahhhhh!

I included a few photos of my girls in the super cute bathing suits and hula skirts Della got the girls for their birthday. Its too dang cold for them to swim in them, so for now they are fun dress up outfits and the girls love them. And I love photographing them, so everyone is happy. And check out Hayden, how cute is he? (Svea turned her head for almost every pic...which explains why most of the pics are of her camera happy sister)

1 comment:

candice_armitage said...

I miss my cousins! why do they have to be so freakin cute! I love the outfits... so they have my size? can't wait to see you guys.. MISS YOU :)