Monday, February 23, 2009

Life has become such a busy place that I have neglected to keep my blog up to date..on any level.

Firstly, Ben is in Alberta working for a month. It has only been a week and a few days, but it already feels like a life time. Funny how a person can go from detesting the way he can leave a trail of crumbs indicating not only exactly what he ate, but what order he ate it in, to wishing the toaster had been left out along with the peanut butter and jam...and the obviousness that he has something against buttering toast on a plate, rather than the counter top. I even miss the trail of clothes. Mind you, since the dryer decided to quit a few days ago, I suppose its one of those blessings in disguise (that he isn't here, not that the dryer is broken). What is up with that anyways? How do my appliances always recognise Ben's absence as being the most perfectly appropriate time to keel over and collapse, tongue hanging out the side like an exhausted dog on a hot summer day? Arg. I suppose I really ought to be on the phone right now arranging a repair man.

This is the week I return to work full time. I am nervous about it...nervous that I am going to wish I hadn't decided to jump back in full time...nervous about how the change is going to affect the kids, nervous about little things, like waking up early in the morning and going to bed early enough to get the right amount of sleep. But mostly, I am looking forward to it. I miss my adult friends and the adult conversations and the feeling of being a professional. I miss having a reason to climb out of bed and take a shower and put on pretty clothes. I miss that early morning Tim Horton's coffee. So I am looking forward to this change in my life. I am looking forward to looking forward to getting home from work to see my children come running, screaming "MOMMY!" as I walk in the door. I look forward to looking forward to seeing them in general, because realistically, with Ben out of town and the responsibility of three toddlers (did I just say that, just because he is walking, doesn't mean he is already a toddler, does it?) I feel completely overwhelmed and exhausted. So I really honestly and truly do believe that working during the day will help me to be a better, happier parent during the night. Maybe its all just wishful thinking, but a girl has to hang onto something, doesn't she?

Well, Hayden is now laying on his belly on the floor, the smell of a freshly soiled diaper tickling my nostrils and his best pathetic whiny voice on indicating his desire to be freshly diapered. Not that I blame him...

1 comment:

candice_armitage said...

awww.... I cant belive hayden's walking!!!! He's so freakin cute it kills me.... I miss you guys!!! Sux I wont be home to see you til june! :(
Glad you are enjoying work :)